Lance Maggiacomo was out of work, bored and lonely when he started hiding his online relationships from
his wife.
There was no affair, only chatting through email, yet it felt like cheating just the same. A few years later, a reformed Maggiacomo has an in-house check on his impulses.
He and his wife Lori, like other couples around the country, share one email account as a safeguard against the ever-expanding temptations of the internet.
“There’s not a Gestapo, KGB quality to it, like I have to check in with mother before I do anything,” said Lance Maggiacomo, a 40-year-old surgical nurse from Beverly, Mass. “It’s what we believe as Christians: We are our brothers’ keepers. It’s about biblical accountability.”
The email addresses — “tim_shawna” and “christyandbrian” — broadcast the couples’ commitment to all correspondents. If one spouse has a Twitter or Facebook account, the other is usually given the password. Often, spouses have separate work accounts where bad behavior could go undetected.
However, the goal isn’t policing each other every minute, they say. Instead, they are doing whatever is possible to avoid keeping secrets.
“It’s not a matter of distrust,” said Ronda Hodge, 53, of Amesbury, Massachusetts, who shares an e-mail address with her husband Tom, 60. “We really don’t have anything to hide from one another. We were friends first before we even dated so we’ve got that level of openness there.”
Some couples said they initially created their account for bills and other household business then later realized the personal benefits.
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